Last night as I was viewing the last segment of Wayne Dyer‘s recent PBS special, Wishes Fulfilled, I realized that I need to reconsider a dream I had several years ago while recovering from cancer surgery. Dr. Dyer interviews Anita Moorjani about a near death experience she had and her descriptions of that event lend some credence to what I have cast off as idle wishful thinking lo these many years.
In 1984 I had a mole removed from my upper back which turned out to be stage four melanoma. Our third child was barely four weeks old when I learned that I must have a large area excised to the extent that I would also require a skin graft (which I only mention because the donor site on the back of my thigh caused me much more “discomfort”). My surgeon arranged for me to stay in the hospital an extra several days during which I had a liver scan and other diagnostic tests to determine the extent of any metasteses — which is the danger with this type of skin cancer.
I had returned home with the news that no further treatment was necessary, however, the question remained in my mind, “did they really get it all?” Actually, the biopsy revealed no presence of melanoma in any of the removed flesh. (“Hooray! Could I have it back???”) During that time, I heard about young cancer patients being encouraged to use visualization techniques to picture the chemotherapy drugs as if they were soldiers conducting battle against the cancer. I distinctly recall applying that idea and creating a knight on a white horse and sending him to find and destroy any “enemy” cells in my body and just as distinctly remember that he returned to report that none were found.
Apparently, however, I needed further reassurance because shortly after that I had either a dream or a vision that I went to what I call heaven. There are three things I remember for sure from this dream:
- I saw people who I knew although I can’t remember exactly who they were. The message I received was that yes, I would be reunited with family and friends in heaven.
- A profound sense of KNOWING. When I interacted with others there, without words, I knew everything there was to know about the other person and I knew that they knew everything there was to know about me.
- Therefore, the overall feeling was of complete oneness, acceptance beyond anything I’d ever experienced on earth and undeniable, unequivocal, unconditional LOVE.
I share this now because I am now realizing, 28 years later, that is what I must do. Furthermore, because I was given a gift in this vision of heaven that goes far beyond simply reassuring me that I was cancer-free, or as a nice thing to think about like a favorite fairy tale or story.
So what happens now? Writing this blog entry for starters in order to bring this Truth that I have been shown to the front of my consciousness rather than buried in the basement with other castaway dreams. I suspect next steps will show themselves in time.
- Dying To Be Me by Anita Moorjani (senoradukan.wordpress.com)
- Melanoma Risk Factors: What You Need to Know (bellasugar.com)