When something so miraculous happens I want to share it with others in such a way that they will “get” the miracle too. Therefore I stall, hem and haw, ok I’ll say it – procrastinate it often right into oblivion. Not this time. This time I will relay my experience the best I know how to and leave the results up to the choices of the receiver.
I have heard of times when everything just seems to line up in the human experience to set us up for finally hearing what the Creator has been broadcasting all along. On a warm Thursday in Orlando I was the next in line for such an event. A precious new sister friend was humbly and sincerely relaying her experiences in such a way that I responded to them on the cellular level. I guess this is what is often referred to as “organic” these days – which I have to admit I took as nothing more than a new packaging of manure until this very moment.
As a writer, it might have occurred to me long ago that we are all story tellers. Thing is, I had no clue how powerful the stories I’ve told myself have been in steering the direction of my life. Apparently, this is a mechanism of our subconscious mind, which, according to this method (see “Related Articles”), is like a horse. It is an intelligent, sensitive, stubborn, majestic, strong, creature of habit (both bad AND good) that can, however, be trained. It is also the repository of the reactions and responses to events that our conscious mind (the rider) experiences. (The horse is the part of you that’s saying in your head, “Karen’s completely lost her mind”, or “where’s she been – I learned all this stuff years ago”, or “this is boring, where is she going with this?”) As displayed in these thoughts, the horse is where our “gut” reactions come from; they are neither good nor bad but they are there.
So what? That’s the miraculous part – at least it is for me at this time in my life. The stories I’ve told myself are based on my perceptions of the events in my life and here’s the key: I can change my story. No, I can’t change the FACTS of the events, but I can change my perceptions –the STORIES I’ve told myself (and anyone who would listen) – about the events.
When given the challenge to think of an event and rewrite my story about it, there was little hesitation on my part and I immediately set to work. As much as I have struggled against, denied, prayed and received prayer for, refuted, let go of, and released the effects of my parent’s divorce on my life my story had continued to be: “I was rejected and unloved by my father, therefore men are not to be trusted and I will never be loved.”
Taking a deep breath, I picked up my pen and wrote in my workbook: “My new story: my father loved me more than life itself. He chose to leave because he thought it was best for me. My father loved me the only way he knew how.”
There is no doubt in my mind that those three sentences have forever changed the trajectory of my life because I had spent the past 45 years collecting “proof” that my original story was true. In fact, I suspect that this story was confirmation of my earliest feelings of unworthiness in response to yet undiscovered events that predated my parent’s divorce. As far as I’m concerned, that story is “grandfathered in” to my new story. The truth has indeed set me free.
Now it’s your turn: what stories, based on errant perceptions, have you been telling and retelling about the turning points in your life? Take a few moments right now and give yourself a gift and change your story – and stick to it!